This might be my favorite ridiculous Snooki interview to date. And that’s saying alot. This chick says a lot of dumb shit that cracks me up.

But she really outdid herself when she sat down with Ellen Degeneres this week.

Ellen asked, “Now, when you say if you didn’t black out it’s a good night for you, are you serious?”

Dead serious, she said. “Yes, because I want to remember my night and sometimes I just don’t. It sucks. So you’re like, “What did I do? Why did I wake up in a garbage can?”

And when Ellen asks how often that happens, Snooki casually responded, “Oh, like once a month.”

You have to love this girl. She keeps it Jersey real no matter who she’s talking to or how many mothers of her teenage fans are watching her say these incredibly stupid things.

Catch the full Snooki-filled interview on Ellen today!!!!

While I do believe that Playboy made an real offer to Jersey Shore’s JWoww…I have a hard time believing she would walk away from nearly half a million dollars. So maybe she’s exaggerating just a tiny bit.

Anyway…she says she turned it down because she’s got some better things going on. It’s been confirmed that she has moved in with Snooki and it’s pretty much known that they’ve got their own spinoff. But why not use the Playboy opportunity to promote herself and the new show?

“I am not going to do Playboy in the near future,” she told Ryan Seacrest on his KIIS-FM radio show Wednesday. “There is a better opportunity out there, which everybody will probably see soon.”

It’s not the biggest celeb story of the day..but when accompanied by these pictures it sure is the funniest. Snooki was arrested for disorderly conduct in Seaside Heights, New Jersey today. The universe has a way of taking care of obnoxious people, doesn’t it.

The details of what she did that caused the police to arrest her plumpy little self are  unclear, but she was seen drinking Coke out of a beer bong and taking body shots at a bar earlier in the day.

Just one hour before her arrest, Snooki was tweeting at President Obama, who claimed Thursday on ‘The View’ not to know who she is.

“@whitehouse President Obama…love to tan in the rose garden …I’ll teach you how to fits pump!”

Maybe Pres. Obama just had her arrested for the hell of it because she is so lame.

Say that three times fast. Snooki Cookie. Snooki Cookie. Snooki Cookie.

I’ll leave the ‘she’s already had too many cookies‘ jokes to you, but like any dumb girl Nicole’ Snooki’ Polizzi is trying to lose weight the “easy” way. Not that I don’t hope this cookie thing doesn’t work out for her. I’m just saying that Jessica Biel, Fergie, Rihanna, Jessica Alba, Kate Hudson and Kim Kardashian didn’t get their hot bodies eating cookies. Although I did hear once that Mandy Moore used this cookie thing as a calorie control diet.

But I guess if you are a D-lister that needs to lose weight, and you need money, you’ll attach your name to anything. She would’ve done better with NutriSystem or Jenny Craig but she doesn’t have the juice to get those kind of endorsements.

Another paycheck for Snooki: All those shots and beers have caught up with the ‘Jersey Shore’ star, who is 4’9″ and now weighs 110 pounds. She used to be a ‘ripped’ cheerleader and wiegh 90 lbs. To get back down to 100, she has embarked upon Dr. Siegal’s cookie diet, which involves eating six 90-calorie cookies a day plus a small meal.

“I used to be fit. Now I look at myself, and I’m like, What the hell happened?” She then quickly added that she isn’t about to stop getting her swerve on either. “If I go out I am going to have a drink, but I am not going to have 10 drinks like I usually would,” she said.

Watch Snook and Dr. Cookie below..and don’t get scared when they put the camera close up on her chomping a diet banana cookie. It’s over in a few seconds.

Before you get any ideas…Snooki is NOT at the cool Hard Rock Hotel in Las Vegas. She booked a very lucrative gig at the Seminole Indian Hard Rock Hotel in Hollywood, Florida. She is BANKING!

I love this little hot mess. She looks like a tiny Italian sausage stuffed into a cheap dress. And someone  needs to tell her that 1995 called and they want their duck lip pose back.

Wouldn’t you know she looks at home on that pole? Go Snooki!