The news broke earlier this afternoon that Charlie Sheen has been officially fired from Two and a Half Men.

Warner Bros. issued the following statement: “After careful consideration, Warner Bros. Television has terminated Charlie Sheen’s services on ‘Two and a Half Men,’ effective immediately.”

Charlie’s reaction:

“This is very good news. They continue to be in breach, like so many whales. It is a big day of gladness at the Sober Valley Lodge because now I can take all of their bazillions, never have to look at whatshiscock again and I never have to put on those silly shirts for as long as this warlock exists in the terrestrial dimension.”

That bit about not wearing the silly shirts ever again is about the smartest thing I’ve heard him say since he transcended and became a bitchin’ rock star from Mars.

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Charlie Sheen’s Ustream internet show cleverly titled “Sheen’s Korner” (he’s an alien rockstar with tiger blood and those guys all spell corner with a K) will be returning next Saturday night.

The show premiered on Ustream Saturday night at 10 p.m. and featured Charlie with his goddess “Napalm Nattie” Kenly, entertainer Simon Rex and his assistant, Rick Calamaro.

The program showcased some people Charlie says are “winning,” as well as some dog and cat pictures and other odd and rambling conversation. At one point, he had more than 115,000 simultaneous viewers which, while I think is really low considering all the bru-haha this dude has caused over the past week,  ain’t bad kids.

It was short notice and hardly anyone I talked to Saturday night even knew it was happening. That number will easily double or triple for the second show as long as the Charlie Crazy Train keeps chugging this week.

When asked how he thought he did on his first stream, Chuck said:, “For having four hours of prep, we did great. Gonna revamp the format a bit and hit em with both barrels next week. A winning moment, but I have a plan to make it tons more Gnarlington …:)”

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When I went to bed last night after watching 20/20 all was good at the Sober Valley Lodge . But as soon as I turned on this morning I found out that Brooke Mueller finally grew a pair and got her kids away from Charlie Sheen and the goddessess.

And Charlie is pissed. Because now Brooke is WINNING.

A judge temporarily stripped Charlie Sheen of custody of his twin sons Tuesday, after Brooke Mueller submitted a declaration in which she alleged Charlie said, “I will cut your head off, put it in a box and send it to your mom” … TMZ has learned.Brooke’s lawyer got a temporary restraining order against Charlie, prohibiting him from going near her.  The judge also ordered Charlie to surrender their twin boys — Bob and Max — to Brooke while the TRO remains in effect.

According to legal docs, Brooke also claims … on February 23 Charlie threw a phone inside his house and then with a penknife in hand, threatened to stick it in Brooke’s eye.

Charlie’s team is furious that the order was issued and plans to go to court tomorrow in an attempt to undo it.

Charlie twittered Tuesday night, “My sons are fine … My path is now clear …. Defeat is not an option!”

Yep. The rock star from Mars has found a new outlet for his rants.

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He’s coming down. Slowly.

Charlie Sheen seems calmer and a tiny bit less obnoxious than yesterday…but that ego is still there. And so is the crazy.

But I did read a report that he told someone that is finally feeling some regret for some of his batshit crazy actions over the past year.

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‘Today’ aired part 2 of the Charlie Sheen interview Tuesday, and Sheen introduced NBC’s Jeff Rossen to the “goddesses” of “Sober Valley Lodge,” what he now calls his Hollywood home.

“These women don’t judge me,” he said. “They don’t judge me. They don’t lead with opinion. They don’t– they don’t– they don’t lead with their own needs all the time. They’re honest enough to tell me, ‘Hey, look, you– you know, park your nonsense. I– I– you gotta help me solve this. We solve it.”

Sheen is currently living with two girlfriends he calls “goddesses,” a porn star, “Rach,” and a model, “Natty.” He told Rossen that they live in “domestic bliss” and the women help him take care of his young twin boys, whose mother is Sheen’s ex-wife Brooke Mueller.

“If I can’t be there, they’re there,” he said of the goddess babysitters.

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For real this time.

It started as just a rumor from a tweet John Stamos posted Friday, “Contrary to the rumors, I am not replacing Charlie Sheen on Two and a Half Men. however, Martin Sheen has asked me to be his son.”

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