Shocking news today kids! The very strong and solid marriage of Peaches Geldof and Max Drummy is ending in divorce. 19 year old Peaches and her musician husband of only four months tried their hardest to hold it together, but sadly the complexities of a teenage drug addict marriage was more than either of these two knuckleheads could handle.

“She realised it was all a mistake – and her dad Sir Bob is delighted. She doesn’t fancy him any more, and wants to move on. To her it is as simple as that. She just wants to divorce him and find a new boyfriend.

“Max is heartbroken. He has been through the mill in the last three months, but there is nothing he can do. He genuinely believed marriage was a long term commitment, but Peaches has shattered his dreams.”

Peaches father Sir Bob Geldof is said to be ecstatic that his daughter is divorcing and returning to England from New York for a while. But he is growing more and more concerned about her erratic, drug-addled behavior. Peaches cocaine habit was exposed earlier this year and since then she’s just done stupider and stupider things. Last week her highly anticipated first contribution to Nylon magazine was panned by critics everywhere as …for lack of a better word…crap.

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