One day their army kids are going to ask Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie why they are such horrible sinners and didn’t get married like other parents. We think their answer will be something like, “how the hell where we supposed to make time for a wedding with all you kids crying ‘mommy pax hit me!’ or ‘ daddy shiloh is touching me!’ all the freakin’ time!”

Anyway, the big rumor over the weekend was that Brad and Angie tied the knot in the French Quarter, but it looks like Star magazine jumped the gun on publishing that story.

Sources in a position to have information regarding a secret wedding ceremony between Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie had confirmed to Star that the couple married in the French Quarter Wedding Chapel on Saturday, March 29. “There were two weddings, one planned and one unplanned,” one source told Star. “Brad and Angelina’s was the planned ceremony. The weather wasn’t good, so we were indoors.” After further investigation, the sources are not standing by their story. Brad and Angelina’s reps have not commented.

People denies it all by saying:

Despite reports that Angelina Jolie and Brad Pitt wedded in a New Orleans church Saturday, a source close to the couple tells PEOPLE there was “no wedding.”