Somebody at Shape magazine really likes Lauren Conrad ..or maybe someone at Shape owes MTV a big favor or something.

The September issue of Shape magazine is LC’s second cover in the past year or so.

America’s Next Top Model is dying a slow death, so The Tyra will reluctantly be sharing the spotlight with guest stars every episode this cycle.

Lauren Conrad and Kim Kardashian will both appear separately on new episodes during the show’s 13th cycle.

Conrad will join host Tyra Banks, photographer Nigel Barker and runway coach J. Alexander on the judges’ panel on Sept. 16, while Kardashian’s turn comes Oct. 21. In fact, each episode of the cycle, which premieres Sept. 9 (8 p.m. EST) on the CW, will feature a member of the fashion community as a guest judge.

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I saw this coming a mile away kids. What the hell was Lauren Conrad thinking when she quit ‘The Hills’? Sources say she is trying desperately  to get back on the hit show but now that MTV has signed on Kristin Cavallari that’s probably not going to happen.

On a positive note, Lauren is now dating “My Boys” star Kyle Howard so she can cry on his shoulder. And according to Page Six Vanesssa Minnillo and Lauren are becoming new BFF’s. Probably because Van needs a job as she was just turned down for a role on Melrose Place.

It’s funny to me that anyone in the Lauren Conrad camp even thought that people would want her unimaginative designs. Lauren just can’t compete with other celebrity designers like Gwen Stefani’s L.A.M.B. or Mary-Kate Olsen’s Elizabeth and James.

L.C.’s racks at Bloomingdales are completely full and overflowing and Kitson has bins and bins of her inferior product sitting in their store. This after the store ran a recent Buy One Get One Free sale on L.C.’s stuff. If you are bored and have nothing better to do, you can see Lauren’s stale old dresses HERE.

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Warning: This post may cause headaches or stomach cramps when you found out how much cash these extremely untalented idiots are making per episode while you slave away in your cube for a pittance.

Lauren Conrad: $75,000 per episode
Heidi Montag: $65,000 per episode
Spencer Pratt: $65,000 per episode
Audrina Patridge: $35,000 per episode
Whitney Port: $20,000 per episode
Brody Jenner: $10,000 per episode
Lauren “Lo” Bosworth: $10,000 per episode
Stephanie Pratt: $8,000 per episode

This new information gives me new insight into why someone would be as colossally cheesy and embarrass themselves on a daily basis. Is it really possible these idiots are making twice as much as 99% of our counties teachers??!! That sound you hear is me banging my head against a wall.

Lauren Conrad got a little tipsy at her 22nd birthday party at S Bar this week, and nearly gave the world a very special The Hills nip slip.

Empty Beer Boxes At Lindsay Lohan’s House – Ninja Dude

Jessica Simpson Is A Green Monster – Celeb Parasite

Latest and Greatest Britney Spears Upskirt – Hollywood Sleazy (NSFW Site)

Angelina Jolie Doesn’t Love Shiloh – Seriously?OMG!WTF!

Julia Roberts Has Man Arms – Celebrity Smack

Lauren Conrad Might Want To Rethink This Dress – Jordan Is Your Homeboy

Jessica Simpson Ready For Full Frontal Nudity – Derek Hail 

PETA Goes After The Olsen Twins – Gabby Babble

Steven Tyler’s Girlfriend Kicks Ass – Bumpshack 

Hilary Swank Takes A Lot Of Vitamins – The Blemish

Hayden Panettierre Rocks Stripper Boots – Drunken Stepfather (NSFW Site)

Who are Heidi and Spencer and Why Do We Care They Split Up? – Girls Talkin Smack

Here is some Monday morning eye candy for you. The Hills stars Lauren Conrad and Audrina Partridge Maxim magazine outtake. Sorry they are low quality, but LC in her undies even in LQ is ok, right?