Kevin Federline’s attorney said in court Thursday that Britney Spears has missed 8 out of 14 random drug test requests and alleges that she lives in a “parallel universe”. Mark Vincent Kaplan also reminded the court that Britney has already been reprimanded three times by the judge for failing to be reachable by phone. Not wanting to sound completely evil, Kaplan also made the following comment:

“Mr. Federline doesn’t want to take these children out of their mother’s life, but what are we to do?”

Britney’s lawyer explained to the judge that her client had to change her phone number often to keep her number from falling into the wrong hands. When the judge replied that he didn’t feel responding back to a morning phone call was an extreme request, Brit’s lawyer shot back:

“But you’re not a pop star with a No. 1 album to promote.”

Ms. Smarty Pants Attorney must not read the papers because her client does not in fact have a number one album to promote. Britney’s new album Blackout is No. 2 on Billboard. Sheeze…those lawyers think they know everything.

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